'Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.' Titus 2:3-5
I've been working through Carolyn Mahaney's 'Feminine Appeal' and the series 'God's beautiful design for women' on Revive our Hearts, because I've been feeling really convicted lately that I haven't got my priorities right. Having just had a new baby, it's a good time to re-evaluate where I am in my life, and whether I am doing the things God has called me to do, or getting distracted with other things that don't really matter.
You can't ignore from these verses in Titus that, as women, our priorities have to be focused around loving God and loving our families. Home has to be a priority, whether we work outside of it or not. I've been struck by some of this teaching that the home was created by God, and in society today the home is falling apart. It's because we've got our priorities wrong and we've believed the lie that we need a successful career and a good salary to be fulfilled. Our culture tells us that being in the home is not as valuable as making a financial contribution to the family outside of it, so too often we are sacrificing our family life in favour of earning more money. I'm not saying all women should be stay-at-home mums with no outside jobs because I really enjoy my job! But I do think it's easy for my job to take the first and best of me, and my home and family to get whatever is left over of my time and energy.
It's not about making our homes an idol, a beautiful magazine-type place #CathKidston etc. We want to make our homes somewhere we belong, somewhere orderly, a place we want to return to, a space where we talk and grow together as a family, a place which draws in those that we love and outsiders to know and love God better. This can only happen through the grace of God and the power of the Holy Spirit. The gospel has transformed our lives, and as we seek to obey God by doing the things we are told to do in Titus 2 (love our husband and children, be self-controlled, pure and kind, working at home and being submissive to our husband), this shows the world how amazing the gospel is.
The heart attitude with which we serve -doing chores, cooking meals, cleaning and so on- is absolutely crucial, because we are called to be kind. This passage in Titus calls us to be selfless women, Christ-centred and other-person-centred, like Dorcas in Acts 9. Kindness of heart will not make menial tasks glamorous, but it will lift the load and make them an act of real love and worship.
The emphasis in Titus on self control shows the importance of having a sound mind too. We can't do any of these things without disciplining our minds to put the brakes on to unsound thinking and behaviour. Nancy Leigh de Moss's portraits of a sophron woman (sound) and non-sophron woman are really convicting. For myself, I need to beware of the following things:
- being easily discontented, having the mindset 'I deserve better'
- being easily provoked
- being highly opinionated and always seeking to have the last word
- being overly concerned about what other people think.
We need sound doctrine in our minds and lived out in our daily behaviour. After all, the way you live reveals what you actually believe.
Our lives are to reflect the beauty, the balance, the stability that the gospel brings to a mind, a life and a home. The goal for us as women is to know what really matters, to have right priorities, and to be content with what we have. We are to live lives of purpose and intentionality, service, and giving and blessing others. This is spiritual maturity.
Monday, August 25, 2014
Some thoughts on Titus 2 - priorities
Labels:
career,
doctrine,
family,
home,
priorities,
self control,
Titus,
women
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